Well. This is weird.

If you close your eyes and squint a little, don't you think this post bears an eery resemblance to this one?

Of course, it's hardly plagiarism on the scale of the controversy currently doing the rounds over in the slightly sinister domain of the mommybloggers. To be honest I'm more concerned that I found the post through a google search for "a safe mooring" (Don't look at me like that. You're telling me you've never googled your own blog?) and now I'm worried people might think I was personally responsible for this crime against the English language. For example, "I really, Present reckon that Oahu is the believed that number Points wedding presents." Um, what? That isn't even a sentence. Nor is "And thus Reasonable goal the kind of person who is going to breezily Expect Kansas city lasik surgery invoice". I mean... I just.. what are they on about?

In fairness, "Obtain drunken Experience Equipped with Mate Yvonne" does sound like something I'd say. And "minimising potential risk of a seventeen-toaster calamity" actually is something I said. (Seriously, of all the insane Frankensentences you put in that post, you had to get that one word-for-word?)

Hilarious as it is, I should probably get them to take it down. It's not really fair for some random scraper site to be profiting from my own ill-judged babbling. Fin's comment on the whole debâcle was, as ever, incisive:

"How come they can make money from it when you don't make any?"

GOOD POINT, FIN. Anybody want to offer me some money for some sentences that may or may not involve toasters and/or make sense? Anybody...?

{Image: Albumen print by Stephen Berkman (New York: Bliss, Zohar Studios, n.d.) From the collection of Ricky Jay.}