I have something important to ask you.

Is there an ‘h’ at the end of ‘bla’?

An eagle-eyed reader (hi, Dad) had the front to question the spelling in my last post. Apparently, spell-check agrees. WHATEVER.

To my mind, it's all about context. “Bla bla bla” mimics pointless chatter. “Feeling a bit blah” denotes melancholy or boredom. Are there two bla(h)s, maybe?

They sound different in my head. “Bla” has a nice Scottish ring to it – that flat, short “ah” sound, like the “ba-” in “battered Mars bar” – while “blah” seems to lend itself to a long, drawn-out, Home Counties sort of vowel, or perhaps a Texan twang. Try it. Bla. Blah. Bla. Blaaahhh.

This is the kind of thing that rattles around my brain. Thanks, Dad, for asking the question. I'm sticking to my guns, but you are entirely welcome to disagree.

I will now segue effortlessly into an entirely different topic by mentioning that the man in that picture up there has a beard. You know who else has a beard? Fin. You know something else about Fin? Three years ago today, reader, I married him.

Our first three years of marriage have seen a fair amount of bla-bla-bla and the occasional, unwelcome dollop of blah, but I wouldn't have swapped them for the world. Happy anniversary, Kais. Love you.

Bla bla bla by Villaraco on Society6

SEE ALSO:

→ This time last year

→ Two.

Lately

Things have been a bit, well, shit. My mum is having more treatment, again, which means she'll soon be bald, again. My body has been behaving traitorously in numerous ways, most recently by puffing my tonsils up like popcorn. Our neighbourhood went on fire. Twice. And some other things. And a few more things. And, and, and. Bla, bla, bla.

While life has been stabbing me and my tonsils with the pricks of a thousand tiny needles, I've been wrapping myself in every soft thing I can find. I pull my words close like a blanket. Writing candidly feels like nakedness, writing fluff feels like a cop-out. So I write nothing. I read nothing. I feel nothing, or so I like to tell myself.

In the end, the simple pleasures are what save me. Bright colours on a sunny day. Friends from afar, bearing Pop-Tarts and penises (don't worry, they were free range). Skipping and shrieking into the North Sea, with only two dogs and handful of bewildered tourists for company. The final countdown to a dear friend's wedding. And did I mention the Pop-Tarts?

I'm still choosing my words carefully, weighing up which ones I can spare. Writing means thinking, and my thoughts have been otherwise occupied lately. Occupied with very important things, of course; like imagining ways to surf Pinterest for a living, and setting up Smidgen's Instagram account because apparently I'm now that level of crazy. (Seriously though, you should follow her. She's very photogenic.)

Other, less ridiculous thoughts are jostling their way to the surface. The words will follow. I'm almost sure of it. Stick around, won't you?


Failed Opportunities print by JenniPenni

SEE ALSO:

→ Not writing, but reading

→ Back

→ Time, gentlemen, please

Cheers!

Well, that's it. The last post is up. My reign as UK guest editor of A Practical Wedding is officially over. Sob.

If you've been missing your regular dose of my wit and charm (and really, WHO WOULDN'T?), I'd recommend popping over to read my posts on APW. Even if you're not a regular reader, or a bride, or a woman, or a person who gives a shit about weddings, there's something you'll enjoy. Probably.

Here's what you've been missing:

1. A British Person's Guide to American Weddings. The comments started off well, then rapidly declined into a convoluted discussion about jam. I'm still trying to work out how that happened.
2. Jane and Peter's Misty Rooftop Garden Wedding. Short-haired bride, baby in a kilt, amazing shoes. Need I say more.
3. Hats for wedding guests. Prices range from £29.50 to £1,285. FOR A HAT. If you can spot the expensive one without peeking, you get it for free!*
4. What happens when your friends don't like your partner? I didn't write this one; Anna K did. It makes me feel uncomfortable, and that's a very good thing.
5. Lillian and Leonard: A Love Story. Because there's nothing I enjoy more than making wedding photographers feel intensely awkward.
6. And right now, RIGHT THIS VERY MOMENT, it's APW Happy Hour. Which means some highlights, some links I've found around the web, and booze. You should totally come.
7. BONUS: I've been at the helm of the APW Pinterest account for the last couple of days too. Highlights include a wedding bus, an amazing beard and a dogs wearing a flower crown. What's not to love?

So, that's your Friday afternoon reading sorted. 

On a sort-of-not-really related topic: not one but two of my dearest and most beloved readers have managed to get themselves hospitalised in the last week (not together, this isn't an episode of Casualty) and, once they've finished reading every one of these posts, they'll probably be feeling pretty bored and fed up. Can we send them our collective love and best wishes in the comments? I think we can.

Happy weekend, team.

*Haaaaaaa. In your dreams.

Image: Natalia hat by Bundle MacLaren Millinery

SEE ALSO:

→ Three things

→ International what day?

→ M is actually for Ms

Elsewhere

Life has been a little overwhelming lately. My thoughts, and my words, have been elsewhere. I'm trying to find space to write something for you that's not related to poetry or chocolate, and in the meantime you can find me in one of two places:

LOVE MY DRESS

First, the lovely Annabel has been plastering me and my nonsense all over Love My Dress in the last few weeks.

A couple of months ago (alright, it was April, I've been busy) she was kind enough to invite me to a party celebrating the launch of her new(ish) book, Style Me Vintage: Weddings. I basically spent the entire evening in a corner talking to the three people I already knew and drinking rum, but that's my idea of a good time, so I thought it was fabulous. Annabel shared a film of the event here, in which the eagle-eyed among you might spy me, my amazing skirt and my terrible posture. Really should work on that.

Then a couple of weeks ago, Blonde Bridesmaid's wedding was featured in all its glowy, wintery magnificence. Those of you who followed my obsessive pinning sprees might recognise a few of the details. I'm especially proud of the purple cows. (There are actual purple cows, that is not a description of the bridesmaids, JUST TO BE CLEAR.)

And remember this sneaky peek? Well, you can see the whole shebang on Love My Dress right here, along with an extremely waffly description from me of every tiny detail. I'm nothing if not an overthinker. In case you can't tell from the post, I'm ridiculously glad to have been a part of it. Everyone involved put so much effort into making the shoot something really special. Yay Edinburgh.

A PRACTICAL WEDDING

And now, APW UK is happening, and I'm in charge. Which might be why I'm so tired. And have so few words to spare.

For those who don't know, APW is A Practical Wedding, a huge American indie wedding blog. I may have mentioned it once or twice. While everyone stateside is doing whatever it is they do to celebrate Independence Day - fireworks? Aliens? Who the hell knows - I'll be making sweeping generalisations about British people and quietly panicking. The party starts on Thursday at 7.30am.

Send help.


Images: 1. Golden geometric hearts papercuts card by Owly Shadow Puppets 2. Lauren McGlynn Photography 3. Hart & Sol West, taken on the Brooklyn stop of the APW Book Tour

SEE ALSO:

→ How to elope to Edinburgh

→ M is for Mrs

→ OMG I'm on RMW!